Confession

by Terrica Joy in


I’m divulging a few secrets today.  And they aren’t pretty, just so you know. 

I’ve been sitting in my reading room this morning with a steaming cup of hot tea, thinking.  About brokenness, redemption, healing. 

And if I’m really honest, sometimes I fear people look at my life and think it’s something it isn’t.  They see fun status updates, exotic travel photos, enthusiastic blog posts about living a beautiful life…and it is beautiful, no doubt about that.  I’m an always glass-half-full kind of girl.  I just am.

However.

It’s a choice.  Being this way, choosing to live and see the world this way, in no way means life is perfect or even a smidgen better than the next guy.  It’s about intentional perspective.  Period. 

In fact, I’ll prove it to you.

Among my absolute closest group of friends made up of a dozen or so people, some of our most shaping life experiences include:

  • Sexual abuse and molestation.
  • Rape, multiple cases.
  • Bulimia.  Anorexia.  Food addiction in general.
  • Adultery.
  • Pornography addiction.
  • Abortion.
  • Divorce.
  • Depression.
  • Struggles with sexual orientation.
  • STD’s
  • Attempted suicide.
  • Shame. Humiliation. Rejection. Fear. Judgment. Jealousy. Hatred.

This list is in no way comprehensive.  I could go on for days.  And when I say we’ve struggled with these things, I don’t mean indirectly.  I don’t mean it happened to our parents or siblings or someone close to us.  I mean we have personally lived thru these things, done these things, struggled with them, most of us still struggling on some level.  I alone can check off almost half the points on this list.  (Now there’s a real confession for ya! Go ahead and read it again and try to guess... ;-)

And let me be clear.  When I say ‘still struggling’ I don’t mean we aren’t free from it or haven’t overcome, but there will likely always be residue.  It’s what makes us human.  It’s what causes complete and total dependency on Jesus.  And we need that.

Back to me being an eternal optimist…when I look at the faces and stories that make up my life, I don’t see these unspeakable horrible things.  I see brokenness, humility, hope, redemption, honesty, truth.  And because we’ve alldealt with something, because each and every one of us would be nothing without Him, we’re all connected.  We’re all broken.  We’re all tainted human whether we like it or not.  Not one of us has a single stone to throw.  Not one person.  Not one stone.

And that my friends, is beautiful.  That’s reason to kick up your heals, relax, and savor every simple moment Life offers you because in my opinion, that’s the point.

Concerning my beautiful life?  Oh, it is, I promise it is.  My glass is always half full.  But.Not a single ounce more than yours.  It’s all about intentional perspective, and my hope is that you choose to see it for the beautiful, messy, brilliant, jacked-up, exhilarating ride that it is, both desperately broken and fiercely redeemed.  If you don’t, you’ll seriously miss out…and thatwould be a tragedy.

Redberries.jpg

(I have photos of red berries from literally all over the world.  This one happens to be from my most recent trip to England's Lake District.  Everywhere I go, they're there, usually in the very moment I most need to see them, a constant reminder of all the above...brokenness, beauty...Redemption's intimate pursuit of each of us.)

What's your perspective?  Glass-half-full?  Or do you struggle with it a bit?